They need to come up with better emojis for how much I love this piece.
A dear and beloved (Jewish) friend committed suicide and it was everything you stated. He tried so hard to fight against it. So hard. And we were all just staggered. No words. It is still somewhat shameful out there to admit that your mental health needs to be prioritized, and that time outs need to be taken when necessary. Thanks for this poignant piece.
My father, a surgeon, who piloted a B-17 in the 8th Airforce out of England during WWII, killed himself while I was in my final year of medical school. Jews do commit suicide. And, at the risk of sounding selfish, the survivors feel pain for the rest of their lives.
I have heard so many of those "Jews don't." The one that sticks out most in my mind is "Jews don't become alcoholics" (because, Manischewitz). My dad (a rabbi—can't get much more Jewish than that) died by suicide in 1974, when I was 13 (I'm writing about it on my Substack, What to Believe). Maybe the reason I never heard "Jews don't commit suicide" is because the only acceptable story in my house was that Dad's death (by drowning) was an accident. By the time I finally got my mom to talk about it, when I was 24, she told me he'd intended to kill himself but that we'd never know for sure. I have to say, after reading your very moving essay, I'm grateful she didn't pile on one more lie. Maybe she'd never heard that folk tale. Or, more likely, she was done with fiction. Thanks for the essay.
Thank you for sharing painful experiences that are usually minimized when it becomes real for families, friends, survivors, and especially institutions. Our catholic friends vehemently respond to news of suicides as sinful. I enjoy reading your writings Bryan, and I'm delighted to reconnect with you here on Substack.
Oh Brian, I am sorry for your loss. Thank you for giving voice to it and helping all of us. You can digress from eating hotdogs on the Valley any time you need or want to, your words always resonate. Talking, writing, sharing - these are all Jewish things too, including talking, writing and sharing about suicide. Scratch our surface and most of us have been affected by it one way or another. I wish you more happy memories than any other kind.
Sharon, Im sorry to jear of tour struggles. it is so hard to live with pain. Please keep advocating for those pain meds for relief, amd find someone who can help you push for them. If they work, you should have access! Wishing you the best.
As always, beautifully written Bryan. Thanks as always for sharing your insight.
They need to come up with better emojis for how much I love this piece.
A dear and beloved (Jewish) friend committed suicide and it was everything you stated. He tried so hard to fight against it. So hard. And we were all just staggered. No words. It is still somewhat shameful out there to admit that your mental health needs to be prioritized, and that time outs need to be taken when necessary. Thanks for this poignant piece.
Brian,
My father, a surgeon, who piloted a B-17 in the 8th Airforce out of England during WWII, killed himself while I was in my final year of medical school. Jews do commit suicide. And, at the risk of sounding selfish, the survivors feel pain for the rest of their lives.
I have heard so many of those "Jews don't." The one that sticks out most in my mind is "Jews don't become alcoholics" (because, Manischewitz). My dad (a rabbi—can't get much more Jewish than that) died by suicide in 1974, when I was 13 (I'm writing about it on my Substack, What to Believe). Maybe the reason I never heard "Jews don't commit suicide" is because the only acceptable story in my house was that Dad's death (by drowning) was an accident. By the time I finally got my mom to talk about it, when I was 24, she told me he'd intended to kill himself but that we'd never know for sure. I have to say, after reading your very moving essay, I'm grateful she didn't pile on one more lie. Maybe she'd never heard that folk tale. Or, more likely, she was done with fiction. Thanks for the essay.
Excellent insight as usual.
Beautiful words, powerful and true. Thanks as always for your wisdom, good humor, and honesty.
Thank you for sharing painful experiences that are usually minimized when it becomes real for families, friends, survivors, and especially institutions. Our catholic friends vehemently respond to news of suicides as sinful. I enjoy reading your writings Bryan, and I'm delighted to reconnect with you here on Substack.
I’m sure this was not an easy piece to write, but thank you for the courage to share it.
Oh Brian, I am sorry for your loss. Thank you for giving voice to it and helping all of us. You can digress from eating hotdogs on the Valley any time you need or want to, your words always resonate. Talking, writing, sharing - these are all Jewish things too, including talking, writing and sharing about suicide. Scratch our surface and most of us have been affected by it one way or another. I wish you more happy memories than any other kind.
The Jews & the Cathokics are very similar in some of their idioms & idiocricy.
Jewish mothers/grandmother's are sooo similar to an Italian/Irish mother/grandmother.
Reading your story I so flashed back to my own childhood.
Thank you for enlightening us & sharing. Hugs!
Jews do commit suicide. Jews do become alcoholics. And Jews do molest children.
Sharon, Im sorry to jear of tour struggles. it is so hard to live with pain. Please keep advocating for those pain meds for relief, amd find someone who can help you push for them. If they work, you should have access! Wishing you the best.